Category Archive for "Strategy"

What drives teens to get more aggressive about sex

  By the time our kids are teens, they’ve learned what sex is and they’ve absorbed the myth that everyone is having sex, and having great sex, too.   Teens think of sex like they think of skateboarding: if my…

How teens mess up with sex (and what you can do to prevent it)

Yesterday I was on the phone with a mom whose story just made my heart ache.   Her parents had not educated her about sex at all, so she learned about it from friends and school.  When she started having…

Teaching kids to respect themselves and their partners

When I get on the phone with parents, we often talk about how to teach healthy boundaries.   That’s not what they thought they were calling me to talk about.  They thought it was how to explain to their child…

How to have “the talk”

Some parents don’t prepare in any way for having “the talk” with their kids.  They get surprised by a question, feel obligated to answer in that moment, and don’t have any resources to help their child understand what they’re saying. …

Swear words and kids

Have you ever noticed how many of our swear words have to do with sex and private parts?   Most of us use swear words rarely, reserving them for moments when we really need to get someone’s attention.  Since it’s…

Parenting to Prevent Sexual Assault

I watched an amazing TED talk last night, Thordis Elva and Tom Stranger’s story of rape and reconciliation.   It’s breathtakingly bold for this rape survivor and her rapist share the stage, telling the story of their brief relationship as…

A simple strategy to improve communication with your kid

When you child is asking questions about sex and relationships, you have to carefully consider how to answer, but at least the conversation has started.   What about when your child isn’t asking questions?   There are lots of moments…

Want to have real conversations with your teen?

Raising teens is one of the most important jobs there is.  It’s also one of the hardest! I know you want to be having conversations about sex and relationships, and to do that, you’ll need a good foundation in place….

Clearing the destructive cycles you don’t even know you’re caught in

There are gray areas which we know are tricky, and we just can’t explain them to our kids very well.  These have been coming up in my conversations with clients lately. The key to teasing these out is to think…

Planning for a tough conversation

Sometimes my clients want help with their own resistance around talking about sex with their kids.  Other times, they know a certain conversation has to happen and that it will be hard on their child.  Have you ever had to…