Category Archive for "Strategy"

What do you do when you feel shame?

We all have coping strategies for when we feel bad, sometimes several.  But most people habitually turn to one of four common strategies: Attack the other person for letting this happen Attack themselves for letting this happen Hide from others…

Anya Manes - Talking About Sex - San Francisco

Help your teen make a Good Sex Plan!

I know, I know!  You don’t want to think about your child having sex, but it’s going to happen someday, and wouldn’t it be great if it happened well? You can help your child avoid mistakes, heartache, and possibly disaster…

#1 Tip for Talking with Kids about Sex

It’s been a challenging week.  We’re at the in law’s because Great Grandpa passed away (we had the official Celebration of Life on Monday), plus my two year old is teething with her back molars, and this was the time…

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When and how to talk with your kids about porn

You knew it would happen eventually.  Your sweet innocent child has been exposed to porn, and is now asking you about it.  Or maybe they’re not – is that worse?  How can you possibly open the conversation?  What will you…

Inspiring change

Changing ourselves is hard.  Changing other people – really hard!  You probably can’t command it, but you can certainly guide and influence.  Whether we want change for ourselves or for our families, it’s going to take some patience as we…

Talking with your kids about Trump’s trans ban

Wondering what to say?   Trump’s tweets came up today in our coaching call for the Opening the Communication group program.  There’s a lot to unpack, many angles to look at.   Let me zoom out and say this first…

Setting sexual expectations

The Buddha taught that the source of all suffering is attachment, and in this case, I’m talking about attachment to how you expect things to be.  There’s two parts to this: being open to reality ourselves and setting realistic expectations…

From good boundaries to GREAT boundaries

I wrote earlier about what to do when kids put up a big loud boundary, when they stonewall you, and what you can do to soften things up.  That will get you creating safety, so the wall can come down,…

What to do when your kids won’t talk with you

Some of you have told me stories about your child refusing to talk about sex.  Hands over ears, fleeing the room, slamming the door.   I’ve been asked, “What should I do when my child flat out refuse to talk?”…

Are you inadvertently shutting down conversations with your kids?

Sometimes we’re so excited to have an opportunity to talk, that we overdo it.  Does that happen to you?   Maybe you find yourself in lecture mode, or maybe your child starts to engage on a topic and then wilts. …